In case you want to read (or re-read if you are a masochist), here are the posts about The Ongoing Saga of the Snellville Snail, in order.
Snellville Christmas OrnamentThe blog post that started all this, about Snellville's Christmas ornament with a snail on it. Some called it a slug.
Sad news about Snellville Snail
Wherein we learn about Snaily's salt-related accident (or WAS it?)
Snellville Snail Condition not good, sources say
In this entry, we learn more about Snaily's condition from a top-secret source, only identified cryptically as "Deep Soil."
Snaily feels that Snellville is passing him by
An exclusive interview with Snaily's wife, Shelly reveals Snaily's inner conflicts.
Please do not call hospital for snail info
In this installment, we wonder how Snaily is going to pay the rapidly growing medical bill. Snaily is feeling better, but he's tired.
Snaily Suicide rumors are just that, a source says
Wherein we learn the truth about suicide rumors circulating on social networking sites, Snaily considers retirement center options, and what does a snail wear beneath his kilt?
BREAKING NEWS
We received breaking news from the snail-wire that Snaily is about to be released from Eastside. He needs a ride or he'll never get home. Who will rescue our stout, hard-shelled hero? He owes a S-load of money to the hospital (and by 'S-load' we meant Shell Load). You need to wash your brain out with soap for what you were thinking right then. You worry me.
Snaily has family visit
Snaily has a visit from his foster family he hasn't seen in 30 years. They have a bit of a checkered past.
Snail ornament to be sold if Sunday Sales issue passes
Snaily heads toward retirement and his ornament will be sold as a way to show Snellville's for all his years of service, if Sunday alcohol sales issue passes on Tuesday.
Snaily to retire to Snellville Beach
Snaily shocked everyone with his decision to retire to Snellville Beach. We're sure if he's thought this out entirely... This link will take you to the Visit Snellville Beach Blog
Snaily's wife undertakes journey
In this thrilling continuation of our story, Snaily's wife Shelly undertakes a perilous trek through suburbia toward busy downtown Snellville to see Snaily's ornaments sell. But Shelly is hiding a deep dark secret, and an overwhelming fear keeps her on her...eh...um...toes?
Snaily excited about send off, uses opportunity to diss yankees
In this, perhaps (?) our final episode about Snaily, we learn Snaily's real birth name and we are again reminded about just how stuck in the past he is. He's ornery, but still lovable somehow.
UPDATE: If you want to buy a Snellville snail Christmas ornament, read this first: http://tinyurl.com/snaily